Q. My son has been playing little league baseball and he really enjoys playing even though his team doesn’t win a lot of games. In the recent tournament at the end of the season, everyone on his team received participation trophies. I found his in the trash the other day. What is with that?
A. Boys see participation trophies as a clear message that they are no good at the sport and have no chance of ever succeeding. Participation awards actually reduce a boy’s self-esteem. Boys understand that you only win if you are better than the other teams and that takes time and practice. As the famous coach Vince Lombardi once said – “Winning is not the most important thing, it is the only thing.” They will get upset when they lose, but that will only drive them to try harder. Giving them an award for not winning tells a boy that he has no hope of succeeding and so he will not keep working at the sport.